There is something to say about Indian and Western parenting when flexibility takes the cake and holding on to cultural values may not always be the best option.
When I was pregnant, as is common with Indians and as I believed too, I always said that our baby would sleep in our room for at least a year if not more because that just makes the most sense to me in terms of keeping a mom and baby close. As most Western parents (apologies to attachment-theory promoting parents), Aaron wanted our baby to move to his own room as soon as possible and at the earliest. However, as we passed the the newborn nursing phase, I was wondering if we would want to move J to his room sooner than later. I went back and forth on this a number of times.
Every time I woke up sleep deprived or J refused to get soothed or take a pacifier or was just being..well a baby, I would want him out of our room but then one look at my baby or a random smile he would break into just looking at me or smile back at me, my heart would just melt and I would feel guilty for wanting him to leave our room. Like I said though, this sentiment came and went a number of times but a couple days ago, after two hours of incessant fussing and me waking up groggier than usual, I had had enough and I knew I had to see the transition through sooner than I would have ideally wanted.
One of the reasons, I hesitated moving him to his room was because of our upcoming India trip. While in India, he would naturally sleep with me and that would have broken whatever little sleep training and sleeping-in-his-own-room habits he would have inculcated by then. Therefore, rather than have to reinvent the wheel, I figured we could just wait until after our return to get him to his room. However, it was too long a wait and I decided to just let it happen now and deal with the consequences when I needed to and not worry about it until then.
This morning, both Aaron and I moved our offices from the den (we both worked in the den at our respective desks – we live in a 2 bed-2 bath condo apartment with a den). His went into the guest bedroom and mine into our master bedroom. We moved the crib and dresser, as well as his laundry basket into his room (den). We also moved an old bookshelf into his room to house all his books of which we can never have enough. I bought wall decals for his room once we made the decision to move him and set it all up this evening. As I write this, J is taking his first night’s sleep in his own space. Fingers crossed to see how the night goes…