I am supremely exhausted today. I just put Baby E down for the night at 7:45 p.m. That baby has barely slept 2 hours all day today. How do people with multiple kids manage their little ones’ naps when they also have to manage a rambunctious and noisy toddler or older sibling?
Beloved J and his obsessions with trains, trucks, and cars! He loves making his “Beep! Beep!” sounds loudly and he absolutely adores his little sister to the point of smothering her with wet kisses every chance he gets. The combination of these two actions means that either E cannot really sleep well or if she is just about to fall asleep, gets woken up, rather jarringly as if a truck is backing into her. I often yell at J when all the cajoling and rationalizing with him to stay quiet so Baby can sleep arguments fail. He is, after all, a two-year old and not toward the end of his second year nearing three, but only three months past his 2 year mark SO to expect him to stay quiet is just not fair to him. I feel guilty for making him do that.
I could just slam an Ipad in front of him so he could watch his many trains, trucks, or cars videos but I am trying my best not to let technology do the parenting for me. That is not to say I don’t do it. The only times I have allowed for him to watch YouTube for extended periods is when I get my postpartum massages and E is actually napping or when lunch time becomes challenging. Yes, I am one of those moms and I do not give a rat’s ass what anyone else thinks of what I do or if anyone judges me. You are not in my stilettos.
Anyway, this morning, thankfully, E napped from 9-10:30 a.m. giving me enough time to get a massage and some relaxation time before I had to go get my eyebrows threaded. Those wild things had been growing for three months and it was time to tame them. I kind of have the ‘looking London, talking Tokyo’ kind of eyebrows and a missing arch on one side. Encouraged by a previous threading salon lady who told me to grow the side that didn’t have much of an arch, I did that and it was time to finally coerce them into shape. Here’s what they looked like after (even though I had to go to a different place): Waaaay better than before.
I took J with me to the threading salon and on the way back, because my gas tank light came on, I wanted to stop by Costco but when I called home to check on B-aunty and E, I could hear her crying in the background so I hurried home. E was drowsy and couldn’t keep her eyes open when I got home but had quietened down. Just as I fed her and she was falling asleep, J spoke loudly and came to kiss her and she woke up and couldn’t go back to sleep. Finally, I was able to get her to sleep from 1:00 – 1:35 p.m. before she woke up again and then didn’t sleep again till 4:15 p.m. for maybe 40 minutes or so. Meanwhile, I had to get J for his nap at 1: 45-2:00 p.m. At one point, J was whining in his room and making a fuss about napping and E, trying to nap in our room and who had been sniffing and snorting (what she does when she is up and trying to fall back asleep), had completely lost it and was bawling. Normally, I would lay with J, briefly talk about our day and amidst kisses and lots of hugs, tell him I love him, wish him a good nap and leave the room. Sometimes I even read to him. Today was not one of those days.
My postpartum recovery has been great but I still suffer from back pain and for the last couple days, a lot of leg pain. Besides, I am also sleep deprived despite E’s relatively long stretches of sleep at night. All of this in combination with a sometimes whiny two-year-old and an infant with changing sleep schedules makes for a very tired mommy. In addition, even though J is a really, really good kid, he is prone to his toddler tantrums and tears and kicks and screams and I have to bear the brunt of them all. Trying to calm his latest meltdowns while hoping he doesn’t wake the baby up, and finding activities to keep him away from E, are all tiring me out easily these days. At least I don’t have to cook and clean for another few days. Starting June 2, B-aunty will no longer be working for us (she had to stop since her kids are off for summer) so I am going to have to do all of the housewife/stay-at-home mom work while balancing two kids. Thankfully J’s twice a week for three hours summer pre-preschool begins on June 21st so I may be able to help E get at least one long stretch of a morning nap before I will need to go pick J up. I am not sure I am ready for all of these changes yet but I have to be. The alternative is not an option.